After the Chief Inspector moved out of our guest flat we tried to fill the space but it didn’t work out. In the end we had a Colonel take up residence, in Lieu of the New Tenant.
The tradition of having a colonel around dates from colonial times, you know. There’s a colonel of truth in that, at any rate. We shall get him a popcorn maker for Christmas.
“Hey, what can you tell me about Sam Peckinpah?”
“Wait — what are you talking about? Are you referring to Sam I.M.?”
“No, you fool! I’m talking about Sam U. L.!”
Confused? Look up celebs on I.M.D.B. (O? U R D B? U N I R D B!)
Witty smart-ass and schplog favorite Andy Wibbels has us spitting the proverbial milk out the nose with his fabulous rant at smug-as-a-bug-in-a-rug Tim Ferris (known Twunt and author of the 4 Hour Workweek). Good use of his (and our) new favorite word. Although “complete douche-lord twunty asshole” is even better, if a bit over the top. All in a week’s blogging for Mr. Wibbels.
A twunt is, well, for goodness sakes you can figure it out on your own.
A delicious little bit of wordishness. We approve whole-heartedly.
Now we’re just waiting to read latest Ferris book, the Twunty Hour Work Week.
From that awesome Jungle Book movie song — now new and improved lyrics
CHORUS
[I wanna be like you-hoo-hoo
Wanna be like you-hoo-hoo]
Wanna skip dessert like you
Wear a skirt like you oo-hoo!
Wanna sparkle like you
Glow in the darkle like you oo hoo!
Wanna do yoga like you
Drink a nice hot mocha like you oo hoo!
Wanna wear a toga like you
Live in Calistoga like you oo hoo!
Wanna be alert like you
Eat yoghurt like you oo hoo!
Wanna go beserk like you
Eat dirt like you oo hoo!
Shooby dooby doo wah wah wah …
This is a verse from a song called “Poor Me!”. It is sung to the tune of “I’m a little teapot, short and stout, tip me over and pour me out”.
I’m more of a lager kind of guy,
But I’ll have the occasional stout.
Hand it over without spilling and . . .
Poor me!
This song is called “Poor Me!” and it is sung to the tune of “I’m a little teapot, short and stout, tip me over and pour me out”.
There’s never been a rule
That I haven’t wanted to flout.
Push me over and I’ll . . .
Poor me.
What ever happened to putting cute little stickers on envelopes with a big ole SWAK … sealed with a kiss? Wasn’t that sweet? Wasn’t that romantic?
You can have your sweetness and romance back if you just use a little imagination. Here are some modern up-to-date options to choose from.
EWAK = emailed with a kiss
FWAK = forwarded with a kiss
FWAXED = faxed with a kiss
AWAK = attached with a kiss
DWAK = deleted with a kiss
Try them all and see which one suits you best!
Consider this a syntax on foolishness, as it were.
Please to play our wordishness game by filling in the blank (____) in the following sentence:
“As it turned out, it was heavily laced with …”
a. cyanide
b. lace
c. sarcasm
Leave your answer in the comments, please, if you please. You play our little game! We are most amused! We hope you are being most amused too!
P.S. This post was written by none other than …. Mr. Moto!
I have written a little song in honor of the man who I imagine might have once upon a time invented the alphabet.
Here’s the chorus:
He’s a beekeeper with a capital bee;
A sea captain with a capital sea;
A teetotaller with a capital tea;
What a bloody great chap is he (is he).
Would you like to hear my new composition? It is going to be a sophisticated tuba/saxophone duet in B flat. It’s going to be kinda syncopated and kinda klezmer-ey and it has words too. And it’s political. Here is the chorus:
John Phillip Souza / He’d love to abuse ya
That’s all I got for now.
